Happy Birthday Momma, I miss you

Sunday January 10th my Mom should've been turning 55 years old. We should've been out to dinner to celebrate, she should be rejoicing in the love of her 3 grandsons... but that's not the case. My mom was ripped from me on April 13th 2004. She was stolen from Skywalker who's little world revolved around her and hers around him. Ripped from us by an evil known as Cancer.
My mom was an amazing woman... she celebrated her 49th birthday with close friends and family knowing full well this would be her last one. She joked about how she would never have to say she's 50.
The pain that I felt that day she was ripped from me is one I will NEVER forget. I have lived with this pain for going on 6 years now. The pain is still there. I laugh, I smile, but there is not one day, one hour, one minute, one second that passes that I don't have that pain. The pain is more tolerable as each year passes but it is still there.
My mom was my best friend, she was my safe zone. If I didn't feel good, if I was having an off day all I had to do was crawl in bed with Mom and watch Lifetime or TLC and the world would become right. If I needed to share the joy of a new milestone reached by Skywalker I called her and she would say "Oh, sounds like Grandma needs to buy him a pony" and if she would have had a place to put them he'd have his own herd.
I gave birth to Skywalker with my mom by my side... complete ease is what I felt... Mom's here all is OK. I thank God I had her to help me with Skywalker for his first 5 years. She helped me to prepare for Zaber and Mr. Butts. To know when to freak out and when not to.
So Mom, Happy Birthday I hope that you are proud of me and my kids.... and I hope you are in the most beautiful place ever because you deserve it.
Love,
Linz