BFF KC posted this comment in regards to my last post about my mom.
"I would be lost without my Mom. I feel so guilty because I have a Mom. When I talk about doing thing with my Mom to you a voice inside me is always saying stupid ass why did you say that. And the look on your face makes me so sad that you hurt so much when I talk about my Mom. I wish I could bring your Mom back. I wish I could have been there for you when she passed. I will always LOVE you and be here for you. Your best friend KC"
First let me state this comment made me shed a tear. This pisses me off because I do not like to show weakness. So I will be punching BFF KC in the face next time I see her. ;0)
This is awful. I never ever want my BFF's to feel bad and like they can't talk about their mom's to me. KC's mom is like a grandma to my kids and I've adopted her as my mom. She's great. She'll call you a dumbass and tell you how stupid you are one minute and then the next does something nice for you. She's a very straight forward tell it like it is type of woman. LOVE HER. I never ever want my BFF's to not talk about their mom's. I worry about KC's mom like I would my own mom. Am I envious that she still has her mom HELL YES. I'm envious of every one that still has their mom.
One thing that bother's me about not having a mom anymore is that I forget other people do. I know it sounds crazy but when BFF KC tells me how she's going to go to dinner at her mom's my thoughts are.... weird..... don't you do that on the weekend? I know it's so stupid. If my mom were alive I would be around her a lot too. Then I feel guilty when I point out to BFF KC that she spends an awful lot of time at her mom's why not at her own house. I forget. If my mom were alive I would hang out with her too.
If there's ANYTHING I want my BFF's to take away from me losing my mom is to appreciate your mom's. Tell them you love them every day even if they are being a pain in the ass. You never know what could happen. Spend as much time with them as you want and NEVER feel guilty for loving or appreciating or needing them.
Nice
7 years ago
2 comments:
Boy I can 100% relate to you on this one. I lost my mom 10 years ago. I was 24 and had just gotten engaged about 6 weeks before that. My mom, sister and I were VERY close and her death was unexpected. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about her and would give just about anything to spend just five more minutes with her. I can remember one place I worked at and when one of the girls in my department would say something about her mom or go on and on about her mom (her mom was battling breast cancer--and won, btw) I could see her suddenly realize who she was talking about and then she would apologize. I would think, "Why are you apologizing? Don't tip-toe around me!"
Just a few days ago my 4 yr old said to me at dinner, "Mama, don't you have a mom?" I said, "Oh honey. My mom lives in heaven now." He said, "She does?? When is she coming back?" It was so hard for me not to cry but I held it together and said, "Well, she isn't coming back because now she gets to be an angel and watch over all of us and protect us." He thought that was super cool. It's the worst part of losing her is that she didn't get to see her grandkids. My sister is 11.5 yrs older than me, making me an obvious, "WHOOPS!" lol. Ever since I can remember my mom wanted to be a grandma and she never got to see one of her grandbabies because my sister didn't have kids. Whenever Blake does something naughty and I call my sister to tell her I can hear my mom saying, "No! Not my little guy. He wouldn't do that." My mom cussed like a sailor and was the coolest mom on the block and I can only hope to be a little bit of what she was.
--sorry! That was a long one!
I understand totally. I was almost 24 when my mom died. She never got to see me marry (which is ok because the first one was a total douche bag) she did get to meet my oldest son and she was often referred to as "psycho grandma" because she was obsessed with him. My other two boys she did not meet... but I see her in them all the time. Especially the ornery one! Your mom sounds like a real neat lady. I get told all the time that I remind people of my mom and before I hated it.. but now she's gone I love it because I know she's still with me!
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