6 years

Six years ago on March 13th I lost my mom to cancer.
I'm not going to go into all the sappy stuff. I do that all the time. Plain and simple my mom was awesome and I love her more than anything!

Here's the thing every year a couple weeks before the anniversary of her death I turn into a raging bitch. I'm super depressed on the day she died. This year I forgot until later in the evening when I saw a quick reminder. I feel awful. I feel like I've failed her. I don't miss her any less, it has gotten easier but I truly never thought I would get to this point. I talked to baby daddy about it. He said that he did notice this year I wasn't bitchier than normal and that it just means that I'm moving on.

I don't want to move on. I never want to be OK with the death of my mom. So am I an asshole or is just part of the whole grieving, accepting process?